What the FUDA?: F-rated Dan Andrews plate still looking for a ride

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Readers of Melbourne’s US-owned tabloid might have been a little taken aback on the weekend to read of an anonymous Mornington Peninsula golf enthusiast with enough time and money on their hands to acquire a personalised vehicle rego plate that says FUDA which stands for “f— U Dan Andrews”.

A picture of the plate fitted to a vehicle — late-model BMW — parked on what may or may not be a country road was also doing the rounds on the socials.

The numberplate reported to stand for “F— U Dan Andrews”.

But all’s not what it seems on this one and if you’re craning your neck on the highways and byways of the peninsula hoping for a gawk at the plate, let us save you some effort.

VicRoads has been kind enough to confirm that the plate is indeed a legit one, issued in July 2020 — when many of us had time on our hands — but it is not, and has not ever been assigned to a vehicle, meaning it’s not legal for old mate to take it out on the road.

And could it be kosher to have a number plate that stands for “f— U Dan Andrews,” or anybody else? Remember there was a guy who was reportedly told he couldn’t have a DANOUT plate in the lead up to the 2022 poll.

Well, in this case the answer is… sort of.

Nothing about “FUDA” would have raised a red flag under the roads agency’s community standards when the application was made — Fuda is a commonplace surname — but now VicRoads knows what the acronym stands for, our Beamer-driving friend might have a problem.

The agency says it rejects about 1000 inappropriate applications for custom plates each year and can recall plates that have already been issued if a problem emerges once they hit the road, so to speak.

So stay tuned.

Williams into argy-bargy on Argentina

CBD is heartened to note that even global pop royalty like Robbie Williams, with a “tell-all” Netflix doco to promote, still finds time to keep up on the international political and economics scene.

Williams was eager at his AAMI Stadium show on Wednesday to prove he’d been paying attention to current affairs, especially this week’s bizarre decision of Argentinian voters to elect far-right eccentric Javier Milei.

Credit: John Shakespeare

The former Take That star also threw in a few unkind jibes about the South American nation’s seemingly never-ending inflation problem, advising the Argentinians in the audience to “sort out your economy” and then maybe Williams might tour there.

“Your inflation’s f—ed,” the performer observed.

Who needs The Economist when quality analysis like that gets thrown in for the price of a concert ticket?

Williams then turned the on-stage patter to the matter Milei.

“Your new president, have you seen him?” describing the newly-elected leader as “like a car invented in England in the 70s with hair.”

We’re gonna let that one go on the basis of fair comment, but harder to overlook was the sighting of Williams in Sydney last week, wearing a campaign T-shirt of Robert F Kennedy jr, the radical anti-vaxxer conspiracy theorist scion of the famous US political dynasty who is running as an independent in the 2024 presidential race.

None of this bodes well for the upcoming Australian tour by Williams’ compatriot Morrisey, former frontman of The Smiths who in recent years has developed political views so strange they might even give Milei’s a run for their pesos.

DINNER DIME

Washington DC isn’t a cheap place to live. Fortunately, the expenses of Australia’s ambassadors – from barbecues and cocktail parties to private dinners with visiting pollies – are all covered by the taxpayer.

And thanks to a trove of documents released under freedom of information, we’ve now got a glimpse at how much our man in DC Kevin Rudd and his predecessor Arthur Sinodinos have spent on wining, dining and entertaining various guests.

During Sinodinos’ time, notable events included the “Great Aussie BBQ” (cost: around $A600) and a $750 election viewing gathering last year, which can’t have been a pleasant evening for the former Liberal senator and chief of staff to John Howard.

More intriguing is the relative price of dinners with various figures. Everyone knows the Kennedys — with a record-breaking second mention in today’s column — come with expensive tastes, and a hefty entourage. So no surprises that Sinodinos’ formal dinner with the US Ambassador to Australia Caroline Kennedy shortly after her confirmation came with a $1500 price tag.

Former NSW health minister Brad Hazzard wasn’t cheap either, his dinner costing nearly $500. All this makes it seem like now High Court Justice Stephen Gageler got stitched up on the hospitality front – he and Sinodinos dined for just a shade over $50.

Most of Rudd’s dinners are sadly redacted, although CBD was amused to discover that our handball-loving former PM’s first event was a barbecue and Easter egg hunt for embassy families. At a cost of over $1000. Must’ve been big eggs.

Tom Switzer.

RIGHT AWAY

The life of ABC Radio National’s token Tory can’t be an easy one, so today CBD salutes Tom Switzer and his nine-year shift broadcasting the station’s Between the Lines show, a clarion call for personal liberty and free enterprise.

The corporation announced on Wednesday that Switzer’s time behind the mic would end in a few weeks when he would return to what many would consider his more natural habitat, conservative ideas factory the Centre for Independent Studies.

Switzer was once — fun fact — a senior staffer to then Liberal leader Brendan Nelson and had a dip at preselection for Nelson’s seat of Bradfield after the boss left politics.

Tom has also been a prolific opinionator in his day, banging out op-eds for the Wall Street Journal, New York Times, Washington Post and The Financial Times as well as some others you’ve probably never heard of, and had a memorable stint as opinion editor at US-owned broadsheet, The Australian.

Switzer told us that even though he may have been a bit different from his ABC colleagues, they were nice enough to — almost — never mention it, except for the couple of times he had former British cabinet minister and climate denier, the late Nigel Lawson on the show.

But variety is the spice of life, they say, and Tom told us on Wednesday that intellectual diversity was the lifeblood of any media organisation.

“On some ABC television shows and indeed Sky News television shows, the panel will all be agreeing with each other, so it’s good to have different views,” the departing presenter said.

And we won’t disagree with that.

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